Embracing the Chaos

My kids make my life messy, and complicated, and at times very stressful.  But I wouldn't trade being a mother for anything.  I received a very poignant reminder of what a precious blessing and gift our kids are.  I will not get to be an aunt again.  There was a "cord accident" and my sweet sister-in-law had to go through labor and delivery knowing that there would be no baby to add to their family at the end.  All of their plans and dreams for adding a fourth person to their family disappeared in the blink of an eye.  They had gone to the doctor's appointment ready to find out the gender so they could start shopping and planning.  Instead they will now go home to their family knowing that it will never be any larger.

Life at times seems very sturdy and nearly unbreakable.  But then we're reminded how fragile it truly can be.  I'm so grateful for my healthy children, difficulties and all.  Before I had kids my house was always clean and well organized, I always knew to where to find everything.  Now there is clutter everywhere, and nothing is ever where I expect it to be.  Sometimes I get frustrated with this, but I've decided to choose a new response.  Not only am I especially grateful to be a mother to these two kiddos, I'm trying to be aware of how quickly they grow up.  I know a day will come sooner than I'm ready where my house is spotless again and I'll know right where my scissors are, and no one will "need" me when I'm in the bathroom.  But I also know when that time comes I'll be missing my children and being a full-time mother terribly.  So I'm going to embrace the chaos while it lasts.  After all, I am extremely fortunate to be able to experience the chaos!