Friday, July 11, 2014

So Tired, So Tired

I'm currently listening to Ozzy in my head singing, "I am so tired, so tired."  My husband's brother and his family are currently in town visiting, so we've been getting together every evening and staying up WAY past my bedtime, and I'm still having to get up at 4:15 every morning to work out before heading into the office.  This morning when the alarm went off I seriously considered resetting it for 30 or 45 minutes later and skipping the work out.  But I didn't.  I got up and did a new work out on the Skimble Workout Trainer App called Brazilian Booty.  I was even able to do the jumping squats and plyometric jumping jacks.  I did have to slightly modify the glute bridge leg circles though.  I just couldn't do it for 50 seconds twice, so I did as many leg circles as I could then just held the glute bridge.

I found in the past that's is so easy to make excuses not to work out, and often times the excuses really do seem legitimate.  But if I allow myself to make an excuse today, it's just easier to make one again tomorrow and the next day, and then I'm not working out at all.  I remember one time in the past when I wanted to start running again.  I had my gym bag with me and had marked my lunch hour off on my work calendar (this was back when I worked across the street from an open space and could work out at lunch).  The sky started getting darker and darker, and by lunch time it was raining.  I don't generally wear makeup, and I always just brush my hair out and let it air dry, so I decided that day that the rain didn't matter.  I was going for a run.  Because I knew that if I didn't just make myself start again, I never would.  It was the memory of that situation that decided me this morning: no skipping.

So I'm doing really well on the exercise front, but I'm doing pretty horribly on the food front.  With the family in town I've been eating some really bad foods, and far too much food in general.  This morning I stood on the scale and my weight is back above where it was when I started trying to lose weight again several months ago.  Exercise is a very important part of healthy choices, but exercise isn't what helps me to lose weight.  Eating the right foods in the appropriate amounts is how I lose weight.  I know this because that's what worked in the past.  I've been trying to remember how I got into the proper mindset to lose weight previously, and I just can't figure it out.  I do recall a conversation with one of my good friends back then who said she didn't understand how I could be controlling my calories so well when work was so stressful since we were going through a merger.  I told her that it felt like one thing that I could control in an otherwise uncontrollable and difficult time.  Maybe I need a large stressor again?!  I hope I figure it out again soon, because I'm tired of being uncomfortable in my own skin.

Last night when we were headed home from my husband's grandparents house (far too late) I noticed the almost full moon peaking out from behind the clouds.  By the time I was able to take a picture, I couldn't see the moon at all, just the moonlight shining from behind the clouds.  This morning when I was doing my work out I noticed the moon getting ready to set, so it was that lovely orange color it takes on when it's close to the horizon, but I wasn't able to get the camera out in time to capture that photo.  It felt like the moon was playing peek-a-boo with me!


I also saw a very interesting flower today that reminded me of Dr. Seuss's lorax trees.




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