Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving!  I haven't been posting much lately because I just haven't felt like it, hopefully I'll start feeling more like posting again soon.  I've just really been focusing on spending time with and enjoying my family.  We had a very nice Thanksgiving today, and I hope you all did too.

I had to share this picture of the waxing Thanksgiving moon behind the bare trees that looks so much like a Cheshire Cat grin.

It's now officially time to start anticipating Christmas (for those of us who celebrate it).  We're going to do our decorating tomorrow and I'm really looking forward to a festive home!

No Progress Report

I forgot to weigh myself yesterday, so I don't have an update on my weight for the week.  Although I don't really think it matters because I don't think I made any progress anyway.  Sigh...

We had a busy, but nice weekend.  My daughter was selected to be in the district honor band so we got to watch her perform on Saturday.  It was actually a much better concert to watch than any of the others we've gone to since these were all the best kids from each middle school.  Then the high school honor band played, and they were phenomenal!

The real reason that I didn't remember to weigh myself and get a post written was because I started reading the new Stephen King book, Revival.  I was much more restrained than I had been in the past as the book was released back on November 11th, and I didn't finish it until today.  I made myself practice some delayed gratification this time as I was reading a book about ADHD to continue helping my son, so I didn't really start it until last Friday.  I did manage to clean my house, do the dishes, attend my daughter's concert, get some laundry done, take my son to breakfast, and walk a 5K (plus some) with my daughter this weekend.  That really must mean that I'm growing up some, since in the past when a new Stephen King book came out, I was useless for the entire weekend.

Things seem to be smoothing out a little for our family right now, which is good because I couldn't handle much more of the way things had been.  I'm sure we're not out of the woods yet, as I've come to believe that never really happens permanently for anyone.  My parents and my in-laws are done raising their children, but I see how difficult their lives can be sometimes with aging parents, worry about their children (still, and always), and the loss of a spouse.  So I guess I just need to get better at dealing with adversity, instead of continuing to hope in vain that it will ever go away.

We were supposed to get snow this weekend, which I was really looking forward to, but it didn't really materialize.  We did have a light dusting of snow when I woke up Sunday morning, but most of it disappeared about 2 minutes after the sun came up.  Even the snow in the shade was gone within about an hour of sunrise.  I hope we do get some real snow soon, because once everything turns brown, it's much prettier under a mantle of white.  We did get some graupel this afternoon which was pretty cool with the sunshine.

We've had some beautiful sunrises and sunsets lately.  These pictures are from this morning when the sun was shining on the Flatirons.

This picture was from the other night just as the sun was going down.

Autumn Ending

So I realized that yesterday I wrote that my daughter was a contentious student.  Obviously what I intended to write was that she is a conscientious student.  So...that's what happens when you combine auto-correct with rushing; now you know!  Those are two totally different words with very different meanings, and just to clarify, my daughter is not a contentious student!

Anyway, today when I was walking my son home from school, I noticed that autumn really is drawing to a close.  Everything is turning brown now, and drying up.  You can see the last of our snow on the hill in the background of the second photo.  We're supposed to get more snow on Sunday, so I'm excited for that.

I'm actually sort of thankful that this year is nearing it's end.  There were so many milestones that I was looking forward to celebrating this year, and it actually turned out to be a very difficult and kind of cruddy year.  I'm really working on making the holidays joyous and special this year so we can end 2014 on a high note.  We're a family who normally waits a week or so after Thanksgiving before we start decorating for Christmas, but not this year.  This year we're going to decorate our house on Friday!

Children and a Few Photos

My family has been on a bit of a roller coaster lately.  Yesterday morning we attended a breakfast at my daughter's school to celebrate all of the students who were nominated as Student of the Month by their teachers for the first quarter of school.  This is the second time we've attended this breakfast for my daughter.  She is a hard worker and a very contentious student.  My son has been having a terrible time lately with his ADHD.  I was actually worried that maybe he had been misdiagnosed and had a more serious problem than we realized.  But we've continued to read and everything that's been happening is actually "normal" with a certain type of ADHD.  So that has been extra challenging, but the past 24 hours have been fantastic, so I'm enjoying it while it lasts, and trying to figure it how to make it continue.

My husband and I went for a walk the other night and I just loved this scene.  I was wishing that I had my real camera and tripod, but since we were walking, I was stuck with the phone camera.

This morning I happened to turn away from my computer screen and look out the window, and I captured this beautiful pink sunrise from my downtown high rise window (again with the phone camera)

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This afternoon when I was driving home I noticed the pond near our house looked very wintry with some ice and and snow still covering it.  So as soon as I got home I grabbed my camera and went right back to capture a few photos.

I hope you're all having a good week!

Cold Beauty

It is a beautiful, if cold and windy, evening tonight.  I am so grateful to be cozy and warm inside my house looking at this lovely view.

Sunset behind the trees blowing in the wind

The snow is really sticking around this time

Personality Traits

How do you want others to describe you?  I know how I'd like to be described, though I doubt that anyone who really knows me would describe me this way.  I'd like people to say that I'm kind, authentic, and possess equanimity.  (Equanimity:  mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in a difficult situation.)  I might get the kind and authentic labels, but I don't possess equanimity.

I come from a long line of people with short and explosive tempers.  But just because it's genetically coded and environmentally taught, doesn't mean that I have to choose to react the same way.  I would like to respond more calmly and unemotionally.  I would like to serenely take things in and objectively decide the best course of action.  Unfortunately right now my first reaction is generally incredulity and anger, before I respond in an appropriate way.  I think I do a decent job of projecting a certain level of calm, but I'm certainly not feeling it internally.

The words that people who know me probably would apply to me are words like strong, brave, and driven.  When I was in college I participated in ROTC for one semester.  (Until they told me I was getting a full-ride scholarship which would have meant active duty instead of reserves, so I quit.)  One of the sergeants (who was from the south) once told me that I was "harder than woodpecker lips."  My dad told me one time that there was a core of steel inside of me, and that I was pretty easy to get along with until you hit that core, then I was implacable.

My dad bought my son a magnet several years ago with a John Wayne quote on it that says, "courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway."  I tend to agree with that definition (though I like a slightly less western version), and I guess I am pretty courageous in some areas of my life.  I'm scared to death that I'm not equipped to raise my son.  But I keep reaching out for help, reading everything I can get my hands on about his issue, and wading in every day to work with him.  I'm frightened that being authentic and putting myself out in the world to be judged will result in admonishment and insults.  But I keep doing it anyway.  So I guess there are some personality traits that I possess that are helpful, even if I don't value them as much as the traits I don't have.

I heard a sermon once about true forgiveness with a GPS as an analogy.  It doesn't matter how many wrong turns you make or how lousy you might be at following directions, the GPS just recalculates and gives you new directions.  Because all that matters to the GPS is reaching the destination.  I wish I could be more like that with my fellow human beings, since I know that we're all wrestling with our own demons.  I guess I have more to work on than just my weight, which is probably good, because after all; what would the point of life be without goals?

Weekly Progress Report #15

One day while riding the elevator at work (no, I can't take the stairs because there's no electronic door lock to get onto the 23rd floor from the stairwell) I saw a news report that motivation is stronger earlier in the week.  I tried to Google it and didn't have any luck finding the study again.  It's definitely true in my case.  I was doing really well early this week and was losing some weight.  Then on Thursday I sort of fell of the wagon, having both lunch and dinner out and not making great choices.  I do this to myself all the time, and erase the progress I made early in the week.  Maybe knowing this will help me to set up different situations later in the week to finally do something about this.

139.7 pounds

It's finally sunny again here, which is nice.  I enjoy the overcast, snowy days; but too many in a row start to effect my mood.

Snow covered mountains

Sun on the snow

Sparkly snow on the deck