Spring is officially here on the calendar, but Colorado is a little slow to catch on most years. I remember traveling to Atlanta for work a few years ago in early March and being bowled over by all of the flowers that were already in bloom. Here we're just starting to get a few glimpses of the season in late March.
I didn't make any progress this week with my weight. It isn't because I've hit a plateau, it's because I know what I need to do, but I'm still having a hard time convincing myself why I need to do it. At 5'5" and this weight, I'm not obese, in fact I'm not even overweight. I'm on the high-end of normal weight for my height. But I know what it feels like to be 120 pounds. I have more energy, I feel lighter and stronger, and I feel more confident about the way I look. This morning during my workout I was struggling with pushups and realized that they wouldn't be this difficult if I weighed about 12 pounds less.
I'm doing a great job with exercise, getting in at least 6 workouts per week. But I've written this here before, I can't lose weight through exercise. Exercise makes me healthier and stronger, not thinner. I have to eat properly if I want to lose weight, and that's what I'm continuing to struggle with. Because I'm not overweight it can be hard to convince myself that I don't need as much food as I want, although I know my body doesn't need that many calories. If I was really overweight, I think it would be easier to convince myself to stop eating, but since I just want to lose weight rather than needing to lose weight, I frequently decide just to keep eating because I want to.
I guess part of "choosing" my course is deciding what's more important to me, my desire to eat, or my desire to get to a weight that feels really good. With every choice there is an opportunity cost, and lately I've been choosing the food over the weight-loss. Hopefully I can get into the proper mindset and report better results soon.
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