Managing My Expectations

I need to stop expecting things to go as planned. I've attempted to drive my son to the bus stop three times on days I've been working from home since he started middle school. The first time I sort of forgot that the dealership had my new truck because they were repainting the hood due to a scratch. That morning I actually had to run with my son to the bus stop when it occurred to me that I didn't actually have a vehicle in the garage with which to take him. The second time our garage door broke so I couldn't get my truck out. Luckily that happened when my son was getting the recycling bins out, so it was early enough that he could still leave to walk at his regular time. Then this morning I thought, everything will surely go smoothly and I'll actually be able to drive him to the bus stop. But it was not to be. My daughter called me in a panic because she forgot to take her flute with her to school. She has three hours of band classes, so this is a legitimate problem. There was a part of me that wanted to just tell her no and teach her a lesson. But firstly, she's a very responsible child and rarely does things like this; and secondly, I feel slightly responsible for this happening. Last night her flute was in the middle of the living room floor, so I moved it and I think she didn't see it with her school items to remember to grab it. One could argue that it's still her responsibility to remember everything she needs for school, but I personally would forget things for work if they weren't in/near my work bag, so I can't hold her too accountable for that. So the end result was that I had to drive the nearly half hour to my daughter's school and drop her flute off, and my son had to walk to the bus stop.

I've learned the hard way that if I don't manage my expectations, I get significantly more upset and frustrated than necessary. If I do manage my expectations, and plan for unintended events, I tend to handle those events much more calmly and with more equanimity. When I plan for things not to go as planned, I tend to make contingency plans and allow more time and leeway. Therefore I respond in a much healthier and more productive manner. I don't know why I need to keep re-learning this lesson. One would think that now that I'm in my early 40s I'd have a better handle on this, but it seems that I do need to keep rediscovering this about myself. Maybe this will be the time it'll stick!

I had an epiphany this morning that I should be applying this mindset to my weight-loss attempts also. If I know that my eating isn't going to go as planned, I can make contingency plans and prepare myself mentally to make difficult choices, which would hopefully lead to more success over time. I may have mentioned a time or two how much I love tea. One of the perks at my job is Celestial Seasonings tea bags in our kitchen. Celestial Seasonings is a Boulder, CO-based company and they give tours of their factory where everyone comments on the mint tea room and the strong smell. They also place quotes on the tabs on their tea bags. The quote on my tea bag yesterday was from Goethe: "Choose well. Your choice is brief, and yet endless." This is really something I've been thinking about with my food choices. While occasional treats don't cause problems, when those occasions become more frequent, they become choices that impact my long-term weight and health. So once again, I'm using all of this and working on my mind-set to set myself up for success which has thus far eluded me.

Speaking of managing my expectations, we're starting to see some color and some leaves on the ground. But the weather forecasters have already started to prepare all of us that due to the type of spring we had this year, (extremely wet) we probably won't have much color this fall. So I'll just try to enjoy what we do get and not expect a repeat of last fall which was simply beautiful here.